BOGYAC

[Chris]

Since a few of you were interested in the BOGYAC charts at the winter meetings, here is an article regarding them. We would obviously need to make a few changes (remove the $$$ part of the chart) but with a few tweaks and some creative ideas, this could be game usable.

If there's interest, I'll work on this and we can vote on it before the draft.


www.strat-o-matic.com/sphere/bogyac.htm

[Jack Flynn]

You know I'm willing to play with it. Suggestions:

1) Not every roll needs to be changed on the annual basis - just the "topical" rolls like #5 and maybe a couple of others.
2) Jayson Stark does an end of year column about weird things that took place over the previous season. That might give us a few clues about what to modify on the chart.

I think the only big question is fines and how to handle them.

[tw]

just skimming over it quickly, I like it and it seems like a better idea than the brawl chart, I think this would come up less and be more interesting.

[Jack]

Adding Home-made Spice

By Lou Bloss

Every now and then I get a yearning to put some spice into a game of Strat. “Groundball-A(ss)” seems a bit antiseptic at times. “Sharp grounder to Vizquel, he scoop-tosses to Lansing who makes a leaping, twisting throw to Bagwell at first — Bagwell leaps for the high throw, comes off the bag, tags the baserunner on the back of the head as he comes down! What a play!” sounds a bit more colorful.

One league has added some of that spice to their game by creating the BOGYAC (pronounced Bog-Yak) chart. BOGYAC stands for “Bend Over and Grab Your Ankles, Chum” because when you roll a result on the BOGYAC, you’re going to get spanked (or something).

Dr. Robert “Willie” Mays of Case Western Reserve University’s Department of Human Genetics in Cleveland, is a member of the league using the chart. According to Mays, here’s how the chart works:

After rolling the first 6-12 result in your face-to-face league, you complete the play, then roll a 20-sided die and follow the resulting action on the chart. Only one BOGYAC can be rolled per manager per night.

“The BOGYAC charts came into existence the same year Strat added the “Rude Play” to the Super Advanced fielding charts,” said Mays in an Internet interview. “It was created by Paul Haberman, owner and manager of the Poundridge Lemmings of the San Jose-based TNA League. To call Paul animated as far as his managerial antics go would be an understatement. He has been known to microwave his team to try to get them “hot,” place the entire team in a Ziploc bag with his dice and throw them into the bottom of another manager’s pool to “teach them a lesson” and has ripped up or burned (in the case of Pedro Guerrero) numerous players of his to break up bad streaks ... usually to no avail.

The Bend Over and Grab Your Ankles, Chum (BOGYAC) Chart was Paul’s way of making a chart like the Rude Play, but RUDER, said Mays. It would cause grief to other managers, but all managers — including Paul — have an equal chance of getting a BOGYAC result. The fines levied by the league through the chart go towards financing a league BBQ during the draft. The league has used BOGYAC every year from 1989 to today with the exception of 1992-1993 when it was voted down.

“In its original form, BOGYAC had too many outcomes that drastically altered the course of games that were in late innings, which is why it was eliminated for 1992 and 1993,” Mays said. “The original chart was written the year after the A’s and Giants met in the Bay Bridge Series which, as we know, was delayed by an earthquake. Much of the action of those early BOGYAC charts resulted in catastrophic events which caused games to be replayed in their entirety or revert to the earliest completed inning to determine the victor. This would often lead to irate managers throwing fits (making Paul happy), but leading to wasted “near victory” efforts.”

One game that was influenced by a BOGYAC result, said Mays, determined a pennant race and was an example of a catastrophic events outcome. Roger Romano, managing Flushing, and Tony Mannino, manager of the Hackensack team, were separated by one game in the standings with about 10 games to play. Hackensack held a 1-game lead in the standings and they were starting a 3-game series against each other. After splitting the first two games, Romano took a 6-4 lead into the top of the 9th in the rubber game. Hackensack scored four runs to go up 8-6 into the bottom of the inning and quickly recorded the first two outs. Romano rolled a 6-12, his BOGYAC roll of the evening, which resulted in a walk. But the action on the BOGYAC declared that a tsunami had hit the stadium and the remainder of the game was cancelled. The last completed inning determined the winner if the game was past the fifth inning. Therefore Romano won the game 6-4 since he was leading after the 8th. He went on to win the pennant by 1 game over Mannino.

Following this disaster, said Mays, Mannino begged for the BOGYAC to be tossed out of the league and it was for two years. It was recreated without catastrophes and today has more monetary fines, which keep all the members very happy on draft day.

“We change the BOGYAC now year-to-year, always mimicking real events from the majors,” said Mays. “Strat is a great game, but it somehow doesn’t quite adequately capture all the color and unpredictability of the “unusual plays on and off the field. That’s kind of what the BOGYAC chart does for us now. Next year we will surely have a second basemen who is suspended for spitting on an ump, a homer that misses a ballpark by one number but is ruled gone due to the interference of a young fan in the seats, a brooding left fielder who will miss a game because he beats up or threatens someone (the constant Albert Belle entry) and a relief pitcher who misses three games awaiting the outcome of his sexual assault trial.

“We love Strat and are just trying to make it as realistic as possible,” he said. “That’s why we have these variables which can’t be measured by onbase percentage or E numbers.”

THE 1996 BOGYAC CHART

1) Instant fine ($5) for the roller.

2) The next pitch is fouled off and hits the defensive team’s catcher in a sensitive area.... unfortunately he forgot to wear his protective cup. He’ll have to sit the rest of the game out.

3) The next pitcher to walk a batter argues the call with the homeplate umpire and is tossed. That’s a fine!!

4) The next batter to strikeout argues the call with the homeplate umpire and is tossed. That’s a fine!!

5) Next groundball double play is broken up when the runner going to second levels the secondbaseman knocking him unconscious. The double play counts and the runner is suspended for 5 games. No, 3 games No, 1 ... he’s just ejected — and that’s a fine!!!

6) After completion of this game, the last batter to hit a homerun in this game has his bat impounded by the umps. He is suspended for three games when his bat is found to have been corked! That’s a fine!

7) Before the next pitch, the defensive team’s shortstop walks off the field in an attempt to renegotiate his contract. Pay $5 to immediately have him return or waive him goodbye!!!

8) Intentionally bean the next batter or be fined $5!

9) Last pitcher to record a save on your team is suspended for 3 games for indecent exposure! That’s a fine. (This one is scary because we wrote these last September before a certain pitcher had even thought about ... well um ... whatever.)

10) Before the next pitch the home team’s center fielder is taken to the hospital for emergency exploratory surgery on his neck. He misses the next three games, but everyone is relieved to find nothing there but his enlarged Adam’s Apple! Praise Jesus!

11) Before the next pitch the home plate umpire drops dead! Both teams’ pitchers become tired waiting for the ambulance. In addition the home team is fined for sending used flowers to the umpire’s funeral!

12) If your starting left fielder hits a homer this game, he is suspended three games for beating the crap out of the fan who caught the homer and was rude enough to ask for an autograph. That’s a fine!

13) Morgana the kissing bandit sneaks onto the field and runs to the third baseman to give him a kiss and a hug! In the process his eyes are battered and swollen and he has to miss the rest of the game.

14) Before the next AB, the on deck hitter picks a fight with fans heckling him behind his dugout. He goes into the crowd and picks a fight. He is ejected, suspended 3 games... and that’s a fine!

15) The effects of Hurricane BUD are still reeking havoc on the weather. Add 3 to all homers and singles numbers for everyone — even if you are in an indoor stadium!

16) The next HBP in this game results a brawl. The pitcher, catcher, batter and on deck hitter are ejected. Both teams are fined!

17) On the next pitch, the first baseman falls into his own dugout attempting to grab a foul ball in vain! He strains his back when he falls and will miss the remainder of this game. Unfortunately he fell on yesterday’s starting pitcher who will be sidelined 5 games with muscle spasms!!

18) The next homerun hit is called foul by the homeplate umpire. The batter argues and is ejected! That’s a fine! Bring in a new hitter and reroll!

19) Rumors abound about visa problems for one of the Latin players on the visiting teams roster. The home team manager directs Immigration to the Latino of his choice who misses the next three games straightening out the whole affair DOWNTOWN!

20) Everyone in the league is fined $5! Thank you!!